The manufactured fun – the manufactured confidence. It’s enough to drop them as cubes into deep sadness. It’s enough to hold them up until first light, filling voids in the voids of dark corners in unfitting nooks of the night. Effortless tears and forced dancing – shows for different crowds, same truth for the observers.
Insecure hedonism – and everybody stands, wondering where their looks went when the stares stutter – when the needs begin – a tank of misunderstanding, and still more pain. The competition is a silly bout of former champions. The emptiness is inside the wet ring left by the engagement of sweat and sheets, left behind, looking forward to awkward interactions. Altercations between self-respect, guilt, and what’s expected – fit for lockered hallways and today’s lessons. Don’t forget what you learn – give attention to what you can learn – it’ll get you breathing on the mouth of meaning, and you won’t have to struggle to hold on to childhood. Even kids know when something is wrong with adults.
You went wrong. It’s the right day to leave. It’s gone, and it’s gone. Pick a spot for a chorus of broken promises. If you can hear the warm, weak beat beneath the flimsy ribs, you surely hear the howling dirge. Hum it in my absence.
i.e. and me
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
the hub
I don’t owe anyone anything. Perhaps this is why I can make the permanent decisions that need to be made at my path’s city stop – the hub – where the crossroads spider. As I approach, the anxiety becomes palpable – a clear sign that a determination is necessary. If I stall, I deteriorate. If I am static, I’ll self-destruct. The freedom of possibility is the itch of life, screaming at me everything I already know but haven’t acted on – that needs attention, energy, and what’s due.
I don’t owe myself. I owe the perspective. If I waste that, I might as well prune this world from existence. I have responsibilities to my borderline sanity and the open vein to my heart, but I have nothing holding me to my history – only those who want what they want and take what they need – individually – and collectively stand in front of my future. Those who give run beside me – towards the same unknown, with their unique, individual, guttural battle cries – in harmony, with mine, out of tune – or just in tune with myself.
I’ve always known this was a journey we go alone. Friends, family – we grow further apart each spring. Love disappears into the void from which it came. God even got his chance, but was debunked by an eleven year old who had already experienced too much to know better. The universe doesn’t remember being born, and we won’t remember dying. Living is the only thing I know. The only direction to go is forward, and though I hope I can bring my hopes along with me, it’s up to the rest of the world to keep pace with me. I know how chapters end.
I speak this in my shy, dry tone. As it happens – being interrupted or talked over, and never being asked to continue – never heard, never appreciable, so it is acted out. If care is guilt, it is self-satisfying, and we’re back to zero – again. I can wade only so far into absurdity before the anxiety – the itch – shakes awake, leaving me up for days – mostly nights. In the hub, reducing the routes – it is possible, what I’ve imagined – I know, and I’ve said it aloud. It’s only important that I hear it. I do hear it. It is a song I’ve known all along.
I don’t owe myself. I owe the perspective. If I waste that, I might as well prune this world from existence. I have responsibilities to my borderline sanity and the open vein to my heart, but I have nothing holding me to my history – only those who want what they want and take what they need – individually – and collectively stand in front of my future. Those who give run beside me – towards the same unknown, with their unique, individual, guttural battle cries – in harmony, with mine, out of tune – or just in tune with myself.
I’ve always known this was a journey we go alone. Friends, family – we grow further apart each spring. Love disappears into the void from which it came. God even got his chance, but was debunked by an eleven year old who had already experienced too much to know better. The universe doesn’t remember being born, and we won’t remember dying. Living is the only thing I know. The only direction to go is forward, and though I hope I can bring my hopes along with me, it’s up to the rest of the world to keep pace with me. I know how chapters end.
I speak this in my shy, dry tone. As it happens – being interrupted or talked over, and never being asked to continue – never heard, never appreciable, so it is acted out. If care is guilt, it is self-satisfying, and we’re back to zero – again. I can wade only so far into absurdity before the anxiety – the itch – shakes awake, leaving me up for days – mostly nights. In the hub, reducing the routes – it is possible, what I’ve imagined – I know, and I’ve said it aloud. It’s only important that I hear it. I do hear it. It is a song I’ve known all along.
Friday, December 2, 2011
The Artist and the Continuing Age of Enlightenment

The Artist and the Continuing Age of Enlightenment
By: Chad Cheatham
An artist who expects to make enough money doing their art to consistently sustain a living for an entire lifetime is residing inside a fantasy world of their own creation. Thanks to technology, the power once held by the corporate side of the art world – especially in the popular arts like music and film – has begun to dramatically shift towards the artist. However, this does not mean the artist will get a larger share of the money – because it is the business of art that is dying. Music and film are more accessible than ever before, and they can be easily obtained for free. This has not only begun to jackhammer away at the foundations of the business models corporations have had for these main culture streams, but it has also created a serious dilemma for the artists in these mediums.
How does an artist make a living when their art is (inevitably) available for free in the digital realm? Another question, and perhaps a more important one to address first, is should an artist expect to make money off their sacrifice?
The mere idea of making money off a sacrifice is in itself a contradiction, and art has sacrifice at the core. As soon as an artistic expression is externalized, it is immediately subject to another’s interpretation, criticism, and adoration – it sacrifices its identity and intention. The moment it leaves the mind of the artist, it sacrifices ego and pride. It’s a revealing, regardless of whether or not an artist chooses to wear a mask during the presentation. Part of its purpose is to unmask truth, and one must relinquish their knowledge, understanding, and perspective in order to accomplish such a feat.
Art doesn’t come out of the need to sustain a life, and creativity exists inside an artist long before the idea of business or money is even remotely understood. We know art predates currency by about 25,000 years. Money is so separate from the creative spirit that public school systems worldwide have the arts on the bottom of the hierarchy. Nobody chooses to be an artist as a pathway to financial success, and as people get older, they inevitably repress their artistic tendencies for more practical ways of life.
Technology has affected music (and the musician) more than any other medium of art, as shown by the music industry’s downslope over the last decade. Being that they can’t seem to adapt, it seems there will be no upslope in the future. The digital distribution of music – legal and mostly illegal – has increased access to a more diverse world of music. It has busted through the corporate ceiling that radio and MTV was limited to, and with the help of a huge insurgence of music writers on the web, the palates of the masses have been expanded. This has helped create hundreds and maybe even thousands of independent record labels – another avenue on which musicians can approach. However, this change in technology has actually pushed the musician to be a marketing manager instead of an artist – to create brands and products instead of art – a necessity in order to stand out, vying for the chance to get signed to a record label.
Recording music has never been easier, but the relative ease of recording has only created a rising sea of musicians wanting to be heard – all clinging to their demos, hoping a major or noteworthy independent label will come along and rescue them from obscurity. The field has been saturated, and it has become more difficult to sift through – to find a gem. Music blogs and publications have helped, but the audience ultimately ends up having the same problem sorting through that information as well, so the consumer is pushed to retreat to a couple popular media faucets – thus limiting their own access. With the technology, we have created more congestion and clogged the drain.
As for film, making movies is still an expensive endeavor – even in the independent realm. While the six major studio media conglomerates lamented about the changing tastes of movie-goers earlier this year, who have shown some bottom-line-affecting disinterest in big-budget blockbusters, the same corporations should now be celebrating as video-on-demand has shown to be a more than effective outlet for releasing independent films. Recent numbers show the grosses for video-on-demand audiences are equal or even higher for independent films that were released simultaneously or before the theatrical release. When the distribution costs go to practically nothing, and the profits are the same, it leaves a pretty clear picture. Still, video-on-demand does nothing for the aspiring screenwriter, editor, director, or actor – it does nothing to support or enable those unable or unwilling to go the route of Hollywood (or Sundance). Contests and festivals are beneficial to some extent, but an artist shouldn’t be forced to pay for consideration, or to display their art. There has to be another way.
Just as they’ve shown in the music industry, the consumers will ultimately disconnect the power from the corporations. The commercial demand will diminish as the public will expect their culture to be free. We already have public libraries that hold our authors, and now with the convenience of the largest (and most disorganized) library of them all at our fingertips every waking hour, it’s going to be impossible to stop information from being distributed, exchanged, and consumed. The arts are included in this inevitability of advancement, but even if a huge percentage of the money is omitted from the equation or lost, the power still dangles and swings towards the artist. It is up to the artist to grab it, hold it, and utilize it.
Artistic freedom and artistic control is the reason why we have the progression in film in the 1960s and early 1970s, “Citizen Kane”, and Woody Allen’s entire career as one of the most acclaimed filmmakers ever. Wilco’s opus 2001 album, “Yankee Hotel Foxtrot”, is the epitome of an artist’s vision being fulfilled with complete disregard to what the record label wanted them to produce, as documented in Sam Jones' "I Am Trying to Break Your Heart". There are countless other examples, of course, and after a while it becomes undeniable. When an artist is free to disconnect from their responsibilities to an audience or employer, they are free to create and express themselves as they would naturally want or need to. It is true expression. This is where genius is discovered, when classics are created, and sometime later, why classes are developed to study them. Emily Dickinson lived there her entire life.
Making it easier and cheaper to create art is the necessary beginning, but organization is the essential element for growth and sustainability. As the world exists today, for most artistic mediums, you have to go to college to study the techniques, tools, and history. Almost as important, you go to college to begin networking – so you can find employment in your field after graduation. Lowering the cost and increasing organization can be achieved through technology.
Popular music artists (rock, pop, and all in between) have always been able to bypass this engrained path. You can go to any major city and cut your teeth on the stages of the many live venues. You can meet musicians everywhere – it’s not hard to network as a musician in places like New York or Chicago. For other artists – filmmakers, writers, painters, photographers, dancers, actors, etc. – there is really nowhere to go – not many places to meet others in your field, and especially few places that are designed for your medium, as a live music venue is for musicians. In addition, being socially inclined shouldn’t be a requirement in order for an artist’s work to be seen or heard. With technology, now even the most reserved artists can and should have a place to congregate – to find collaborators, other artists to influence and be influenced by.
An easy example of collaboration that can benefit numerous artists is a music recording project. In creating just one song, a project can include musicians, engineers, producers, public relations writer and rep, graphic artist, and a photographer. Add a video, and you can include a film producer, director, actors, cinematographer, dancers, editor, sound engineer, graphic artist for title sequence and credits, and so on. What this does is first builds a large network – it develops a team with a common goal. Collaboration also allows for the delegation of tasks. Musicians can focus on the music, and everyone else can concern themselves with their own individual tasks. It takes less time and more can be done. An increase in efficiency and productivity is what they’d call it in the corporate world.
At the four major music labels, it’s a weekday. For aspiring artists that want to be involved in projects like this, it’s a dream – and it’s also the reason why they go down the current dying, obsolete, or saturated avenues – the only that are available – that lead to corporations, where art and artists go to die. Simply put, we are wasting talent, creations, and time – allowing artists to rot on the vines – corporate and otherwise.
I read about entrepreneurs all the time who discuss how they became so successful off of this or that idea – product or company or whatever – and the consensus seems to believe one should never start a business to make money. It has to be something you’re passionate about because you’re going to have to pour your days, blood, and soul into the endeavor. And it may not happen quickly. This is advice on how to start a business, mind you. At the risk of sounding ironic, it seems that artists need to find humility in being an artist. We need to source from the passions – not from the dreams of fame or money.
Technology is the tool, and we need to use it to build a network – a platform – a grand stage for all artists. We have a place to connect with friends from our past that are strangers today, so I’m sure we can find a way to connect a few ambitious artists moving in the same direction towards a common goal. The question of how to make a living as an artist in tomorrow’s digital world is moot because we can’t begin to address that until the model is changed. We can’t take control of that power without the tools to wield it. Until we build this place to congregate, the majority of the artists (and their art) will be hidden from a world of potential audiences and consumers. They will be modern-day Emily Dickinsons. With the technology that we have, this common tragedy does not have to be. We can change that today. ***
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Thursday, November 10, 2011
Higher Learning
Higher learning costs are outrageous by any rational standard. Believing the purpose of college is to produce workers for industry is an archaic ideology, and one that will hopefully die with the Greatest and Baby Boomer Generations. Colleges have become factories, spitting out uneducated children - leaving them with crippling debt and no problem solving skills. Boomers made college a necessity for their children, pushing them through this processing system, but they failed to create enough opportunities for their kids in the last 20 years. They didn't adapt to globalization, nor the technological boom. And, now that they destroyed the economy through negligence and indifference, I hear them blame their kids for not taking the right courses. It's enough to make a sane person sick to their stomach...
State Of Young America: Indebted And Dubious Of Attaining American Dream by Amanda M. Fairbanks
State Of Young America: Indebted And Dubious Of Attaining American Dream by Amanda M. Fairbanks
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
the exposure to the jungle
there is a line between entertainment and enrichment. those who venture outside popular culture know this line. anyone who has ever gotten laid just by being themselves, knows that line. it exists, and i do hope more find it. perhaps it would be better visualized as separate circles, to which, on occasion, i don't mind an intersection of them, ala venn. however, the residue left behind by moments with depth protects me from the cold of this dying jungle, and i prefer not to die from exposure...
Monday, October 24, 2011
The Bonus Army - 1932
Poignant. 1932. World War I veterans (most unemployed) marched on Washington D.C. They camped out there and gathered at the Capitol. Gen. Douglas MacArthur and his troops eventually pushed the veterans out with tear gas, burning down their camp sites and even killing a couple people. This should be watched. Three parts on YouTube. Here's the first:
Friday, October 21, 2011
wake up
looking at how much people spend on end-of-life health care, it's obvious to me that a great number of people don't appreciate life until they realize how close death is to them. hold that thought tightly at all times because you are constantly walking a thin line between the two worlds. live your days, and hold dear those enriching times - don't wait until you are faced with the inevitable. say the words now. do the things now. tomorrow can be anything you want it to be, as long as you wake up in the morning...
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